Saturday, October 29, 2011


Got myself all geared up and mopped kitchen and steamed cleaned the living room and dining room. Showered and picked up Hope and Isabella at noon. Stevie B's pizza buffet for lunch and pumpkin pizza for dessert. On to the movies to see Footloose complete with popcorn and Reese's....Story line was good, music was great, Julianna was great but the language was not....ugh!!! Dropped the girls off so their mom could take them to their neewollah at church ( Halloween backwards).

During the movie my arms were killing me...They go to sleep and have that numb tingling feeling...I hate of the worst symptoms so far and it is far worse at night...every night..if I am not moving them...they do it....

Off to Walmart to do some light shopping...zaxbys to go and home to put the house back together. Clean floors, new bed for Marley and now I rest. Great day.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

What an eye opening experience!

The medication I am on for my Lupus is called Plaquenil. According to my Rheumotologist I have to have my eyes checked every 6 months to be sure the medication does not effect my eye sight...a side effect.....

I am typing this with contacts in my eyes !!!!! Now if you know me, you are shocked right now...I do not like the idea of anything in my eyes....BUT I couldn't see the glasses frames I was trying on.  My Eye Dr. had to numb my eyes for a test and he said "lets just put in contacts so you can pick out your frames"...he said I wouldn't even feel them go in.. I am NOT a contact person...the whole idea just turned me off....But he insisted I would probably enjoy them...He said, "Let's just do it" and we did.....and he was right.....

What an eye opening experience!
It was unbelievable seeing through contacts.......I was amazed.

But then it was time to take them out and that was a whole different story...he could not get them out...after 3 tries him grabbing at them... me blinking...twitching...he had to put numbing drops back in my eyes again to get them out.

I think he was getting nervous because as he was trying one last time to grab them out and he said, "It's a good thing you don't want contacts!!!"
And although it was an enlightening experience it is not one I will ever choose to do again :)

So glad we don't need glasses or contacts to see our Lord. He is always there. He sees our every move, hears our every prayer.

Reminds me of one of my favorite songs:
I have a maker He formed my heart Before even time began My life was in his hands
He knows my name He knows my every thought He sees each tear that falls And hears me when I call.I have a Father He calls me his own He'll never leave me No matter where I go He knows my name He knows my every thought He sees each tear that falls And hears me when I call.

Friday, October 21, 2011

In His power not ours...

I can't tell any difference in my Lupus symptoms. I don't know if the medication is even working (3 weeks in) it's a disturbing drug when I research it but I have faith that in my weakness He is strong. Sometimes we take leaps of faith when we are full aware we are doing it not caring the results just wanting the quick satisfaction of an expensive toy, a new home, a high on weakness....this came to mind as I was driving the T-Rex (4wheeler) I had Marley in the back as always and I was going pretty fast.....ahead I see a squirrel and as I brake I look over my shoulder just in time to see a white blur flying through the air...yes, she saw it in a fleeting moment she chose to take chase....not giving thought to the results of her she picks herself up I am reminded how thankful I am God gave me the wisdom to make wise choices.... In His power not ours...

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, "My grace is enough for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." So then, I will boast most gladly about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may reside in me.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

As We Drive Through The Mountaintops

It is a beautiful day for a fall drive. The sun skips and plays off the dazzling colors of the trees as we cruise down the Blue Ridge Parkway.  It backlights the trees enhancing the yellow, orange, and red of the leaves. Peak weekend. A trip we have been anticipating all year...but who ever thought that Rick's sister Lisa would be laying in a hospital in Texas with cancer....Lord as we look at this weekend and back at this year we see the mountaintops and the valleys. We see you in all of them. We praise you through it all knowing its in the valleys we we drive through the mountain tops......

Luke 3:5-6 Every valley will be filled, and every mountain and hill will be brought low, and the crooked will be made straight, and the rough ways will be made smooth, and all humanity will see the salvation of God.'"

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

There is no Denying That

Over the last few months I have struggled with denial. Denying my mom is really dead...denying I hear God telling me its ok...denying I am worshipping in the right place..the devil can really feed you some lines.....denying I really have Lupus.....other people get this...not me... Denying a true friend would really let me down and not care...she wouldn't do that is full of unexpected and downs...seasons....trials....let downs....But God is always there holding my hand. There is no denying that!! Because without Him I would not survive these storms...a wise man once said, " you are either getting ready to go into a storm, coming out of a storm or you are in a storm". How true.

Thankful for His perfect strength during this time.

Ephesians 1:19 And what is the incomparable greatness of his power toward us who believe, as displayed in the exercise of his immense strength.

Impatience is not a Virtue

I hate to wait....on vacation, weekends, Christmas, paydays, anticipated purchases, visitors, camping trips, test results...I guess I should say I am impatient... I am so glad God is not impatient with forgive, to ask for forgiveness, forgetting my daily walk, for not sharing my salvation, repeating my besetting sin...over and over...Lord help me to be more patient in all things....and remember you in all things...

In all your ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy path. Proverbs 3:5

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Where Does The Time Go?

October is my favorite time of year. The windows are open at night with the cool autumn breeze blowing over us. Pumpkin bread, pumpkin muffins, just pumpkins in general and fall decor. October always gives us the itch to camp so we look forward to our annual camping trip to the North Carolina Mountains. This year we will go without the concerns of leaving my mom behind...but with leaving Rick's mom behind...She is a part of this annual trip...our tradition has gone on for near 20 years....but this season of our life has seen many mom has gone on to be with The Lord, Ricks mom is preparing to go....this season of life makes us appreciate each day, each minute, each in the moment don't let even a single moment pass without telling those you love just how much they mean to you...just yesterday I was raising my little boy and are raising my grandchildren...oh where does the time go...

Friday, October 7, 2011

It's Very Noisy At My House...AND I AM ALONE......

It's very noisy in my house and I am alone....the clambering and commotion on our roof  is keeping me from my rest...I venture outside with dog in tow to see what all the noise is it's not Santa...It's several squirrels on our I stood staring at these rodents the hairs on my arms stand at hubby is off to Florida to visit his mom and I stayed home to rest and pack for our upcoming camping trip...there is no rest for me with all this I squeal and jump about hoping to scare them off the fear of one rolling off the roof and landing on me scares me to the safety of my home......Is that how God feels when we are out of his will?  No rest for Him as we clammer He waits for us to run to the safety of His arms.......
Hebrews 4:10 For he that is entered into his rest, he also hath ceased from his own works, as God did from His.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

That Is Enough....

I really need to talk to my mom…. I need to tell her I have Lupus…but I can’t…She died 2 1/2 months ago… I miss her… She would be praying for me…But she would be worried about me too and I wouldn’t want that…So I am glad God spared her this pain… She had so much of her own.  When our kids hurt we hurt.  That is the worse pain there is… So  I thank The Lord for family and Godly friends that are lifting me up in prayer.  His power, His grace and His faithfulness are with me and that is enough….

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Purple Butterflies

Last night I dreamed my hubby and I came upon hundreds of beautiful purple butterflies. He was picking them up by the double handfuls and putting them all over my body. When I woke up from this very real dream I realized the Purple Butterflies were a symbol of a word I was researching the night before... Lupus...An unfamiliar word to me had become all to real...I was diagnosed on Monday October 3,2011 by Dr Geetha Jonnala.